The Women's Rules

1. The Female always makes The Rules. 

2. The Rules are subject to change without notice. 

3. No Male can possibly know all The Rules. 

4. If the Female suspects the Male knows all The Rules, she must immediately change some of The Rules. 

5. The Female is never wrong. 

6. If it appears the Female is wrong, it is because of a flagrant misunderstanding caused by something the Male did or said wrong. 

7. If Rule #6 applies, the Male must apologize immediately for causing the misunderstanding. 

8. The Female can change her mind at any time. 

9. The Male must never change his mind without the express written consent of The Female. 

10. The Female has every right to be angry or upset at any time. 

11. The Male must remain calm at all times, unless the Female wants him to be angry or upset. 

12. The Female must, under no circumstances, let the Male know whether she wants him to be angry or upset. 

13. The Male is expected to read the mind of the Female at all times. 

14. At all times, what is important is what the Female meant, not what she said. 

15. If the Male doesn't abide by The Rules, it is because he can't take the heat, lacks a backbone, and is a wimp. 

16. If the Female has PMS, all The Rules are null and void and the Male must cater to her every whim. 

17. If the Male, at any time, believes he is right, he must refer to Rule #5.

Man Rules

At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down

  Finally , the guys' side of the story.

( I must admit, it's pretty good.)

We always hear " the rules" From the female side....

  Now here are the rules from the male side.    

These are our rules!

Please note.. these are all numbered "1 " ON PURPOSE!  

1.   Men are NOT mind readers.

( FIRST & FOREMOST RULE)

1.. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want.

Let us be clear on this one:

Subtle hints do not work!

Strong hints do not work!

Obvious hints do not work!

Just say it!

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem  only if you want help solving it. That's what we do.

Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.

In fact, all comments become Null and void after 7 Days.

1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.

Don't ask us.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the    other one 

1. You can either ask us to do something

Or tell us how you want it done.

Not both.

If you already know best how to do it , just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials. .

1. Christopher Columbus did  NOT need directions and neither do we.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.

Peach, for example, is a fruit, not  A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve color is. 

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's wrong.

We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle..

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine...  Really . 

1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as Football

or Cricket.

1. I am in shape.   Round IS a shape!

1. Thank you for reading this.

Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight; 

But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.